It wasn't until I was alone in the dark of the changing room that the 
magnitude, the greatness of the changes that were going on, first 
overwhelmed me. A few geofeet from me I could hear my companions talking 
in a language I understood but was not my own. The food I had been eating 
was alien, and I would not change. I felt the brush of strange fabrics against my 
skin, fabrics cut into shapes I did not feel belonged to my home. The dark 
room suddenly felt enclosing and pressing, a pressure produced from a 
desparate need for security rather than a threatening one. Uncomprehension 
bred hopelessness. I had half a mind never to go outside again, to let myself 
starve to death--from not eating some other culture's foods--in that dark, safe 
room.

Though it felt unendurably long, I suppose it was really only a thought. Soon 
the coldness of solid walls calmed my thoughts. The rich leather on the 
bottoms of my new sandals gave me other thrills, like a calming intimate 
touch. I was not an intruder, I was a castaway in need of help; and by luck or 
by the grace of God I had found it. There were people around me who 
understood that I was different, and were willing to help me find myself. I 
could depend on their support. Maybe I could earn their familial love someday.

I pushed open the door to the wardrobe and walked out of the store. The 
others were talking, and I raised my voice to get their attention, "What do you 
think?"

"You look handsome!" Mer‡n blurted out before Capo could offer a more 
modest opinion, "You look just fine." She blushed as Mer‡n laughed at her own 
impertinance.

'Thank you," I said. I turned to Ayarsca and Arrasco. "And what about the two 
of you?"

Ayarsca said, "We made good choices. I think the design looks good on you, 
and the clothes are well-cut."

"Yes," replied her cousin, "they fit you well."

"I don't know." Mer‡n took a step forward and, without a shred of self-
consciousness, looked me over from head to toe. "It's not stylish, but at least 
you won't look weird anymore. And the clothes are good quality."

I had picked out a tabard in a style that I had seen on two men on our walk to 
the clothier's: the right hand side was dyed dark brown while the left was the 
natural color of the fabric, a white tan. The pants were full-length like 
Arrasco's. I hadn't found a belt that I liked, so I dangled my shirt front over the 
knot on my drawstrings. The sandals on my feet had laces up to a hand span 
over my ankle. The color was an ugly yellow, but they were the only design 
that fit my feet well.

"So," I said, "do I look like everyone else now?"

Once again, Mer‡n was the first to answer. "No, not really. But you're getting 
closer."

After a moment's thought, Ayarsca said, "It's little things. The way you 
pronounce your words, how you stand, how you walk." Color rose in my face, 
and she added, "But what can you do about it, really? You'll get better with 
time."

"I hope so. Well! Let's be going."

"Where to?"

"Anywhere," I said to Arrasco. "I want to learn what this town is like...so show 
me."

We set off along the street. It was made of dirt-colored cobblestones whose 
surfaces had been worn flat. I could feel that my feet and my new sandles were 
at odds with each other, and as we walked a muscle in the base of my foot 
began to burn. It was an annoyance but not an impediment. I let my 
companions talk while I tried to come to grips with the world around me. 
Perhaps, I though, my paranoia hasn't washed away entirely. I need to have 
peace and quiet inside myself.

Our walking tour snaked back and forth through the town. We crossed or 
came in sight of most every street at least once, including some Ibanez would 
have preferred we not be close to. The town was on the western, outward side 
of a crescent-shaped island. Grandmother, Do–a Peque–a and I had come in on 
the northwestern edge of the island. Further south along the island there were 
more piers, where all different kinds of boats could be seen. As well as I could 
see them.

"See that one?" said Ayarsca, pointing to a boat I could identify as blue with a 
white sail. "That one's from Lucinda. You can tell it because only boats from 
Lucinda have red eyes painted on their bows. It's like the one I came on."

"And, ah, that one next to it, on the next pier, is from Dinero. You can tell that 
because it's green, and it's, er, more seaworthy. You see?" Arrasco pointed to 
the main body of the vessel.

"I don't see what you're looking at," I said.

"Eh? Oh, you don't know what to look at. Yes, well, the hull is more sturdy, 
and reinforced."

"Tell him about the oars," said Capo.

"Ah, the oars. Ships from Dinero and Fogata both need to be seaworthy, you 
see, because they have so far to sail to Amanacer. But the travel-winds blow 
the right way if you come from Fogata. If you come from Dinero, you will 
probably need to row...and, you see, there are two rows of oars on either 
side."

"And ships from Fogata are all gray," said Mer‡n. "They're ugly. I like the ones 
from Aureo the best, they're so pretty, and we see them a lot."

I waited until there was a break in the conversation before I asked my 
question. "Is this what you do for fun? Watch the ships come in?"

This time, it was Arrasco who was quick to speak. "Ah, well, Yondo, now it's 
his job...so it's different for him, isn't it?" I chuckled with him at his joke. It 
wasn't that the joke was so funny, so much as...well, I found that laughing was 
better than being nervous all the time.

Capo started to say something, but decided not to say it. Finally Mer‡n had her 
opportunity. "Oh, there's all kinds of things to do. But this is fun, you can get a 
group of your friends together and sit and chat, maybe have some estorbo if 
you've got the money, and just watch as the ships roll in. It's a nice way to 
spend an afternoon. If you want to do something and move around, you could 
go swimming, or play some other game."

Ayarsca pinched a few strands of my hair and jerked at them quickly. The 
body language ment nothing to me. I leaned back and looked towards her. Did 
she have something to whisper to me and only me? But she spoke in a normal 
voice, "You're the most exciting thing that's happened on the island in a long 
time, boy."

She was looking into me when she said it, she was staring straight into my 
eyes. It was obvious that she was trying to tell me something, but I did not 
know what. Was she flirting? Was she warning me? I grew more and more 
confused as, to her right, Capo seemed to bristle: she glared at Ayarsca, then 
turned herself away. Beside me, Arrasco had no reaction, while Mer‡n was 
unaware of what was going on behind her back.

Once again, I was compelled to be the peacemaker, and suggested we move 
along. We had crossed through the town's streets and were now on the 
outskirts, where the houses were spacious or ruinous, depending on the 
neighborhood. I looked down to the town proper. From above, it looked to be 
nothing more than row upon row of white houses. I could pick out a plaza, 
and one or two unusually large buildings, but would that be enough for me to 
navigate my way through the town? On the other hand, I asked myself, where 
would I need to go for now?

We left the last streets behind and continued on a dirt path that led up the 
hillside. It was wide enough that all five of us could walk side-by-side 
comfortably. On either side were rows of golden grain. I took a close look at 
the head of one. It was a series of chevrons, tails up, with gold and black 
spherical seeds nestled in between them. I wondered if it was grains like this 
that had been used to make the bread we had eaten earlier in the day.

"Hey!" I said. "What are these plants used for?"

"The wheat?" said Arrasco. "Oh, food, animal feed. We trade some with smaller 
islands."

"Come on, hurry up!" shouted Mer‡n, from the front of the group. She lead us 
along the pathway to a broad cross intersection, laid out right where the slope 
of the hill changed. There, too, the fields stopped. The space beyond it was 
uncultivated, but looked like it had been harvested very recently.

Then I saw that it was still being harvested. In the field close to us were a half-
dozen animals of some sort. They were vaguely hircine, with long gangly legs, 
small bodies and long faces. The way in which they chewed grain, also, showed 
a close kinship to goats. But their eyes were dull and placid, almost watery; 
there was none of the sharpness a goat's eye would have. Their coats were tan, 
brown, even red. The greatest contrast was in their horns. The horns of these 
animals were coal black, and came straight out from the side of the head 
before hooking in a sharp J shape. I asked, "Are these 'cabras'?"

"Eh?" said Arrasco. "No, they're called 'oratlanes'. We breed them, and eat the 
babies while they're young."

"It's..." began Capo, and Mer‡n finished the thought, "...revolting."

Ayarsca laughed at them. "You two are such simpletons! Oratl‡n is wonderful 
as a barbecue, you've tried it before, I know you have."

Mer‡n shook her head and shuddered. "But it's how they kill them!" she 
wailed. "They grab them like this, and then they...oh, it's horrible! Capo and I 
promised ourselves we'd never ever eat it again, after we learned how they 
make it!"

"You're fools," Ayarsca retorted. "It's no different from eating fish or seafood. 
In fact, breaking their necks is probably a prettier death than having your 
brains bashed in with a club. I'm right, and you know it."

"But why do they have to die so young? And the baby oratlanes are so 
adorable..."

"So because they're adorable, they can live, while ugly fish can die? You're 
stupid, Meranita."

Mer‡n thought about that problem, and Capo was allowed to enter the 
conversation once more. "Sometimes, I wonder if it wouldn't be better to not 
eat meat at all."

I didn't hear Ayarsca's response because Arrasco spoke to me. "You said a 
word just now, 'cabras'. Do you remember anything about 'cabras'?"

"Well, kind of." He sat down to watch the girls arguing, but my eyes were still 
on the oratlanes, watching the rhytms of their chewing and how they moved 
in between each other. "I half-remember an overcast day, at a farm I suppose, 
where I saw an animal that I knew as a 'cabra'. And it looked like this animal 
here. But I can't remember anything else."

Arrasco moved closer to me. "Try. Where was the farm?"

"I don't know. Somewhere cold."

"It was overcast. Did it rain?"

"No, well, maybe it did."

"Was it cold enough for snow?"

"I doubt it. If a cabra was outside, then it couldn't have been."

"Were there farm buildings?"

"Yes. Wooden ones. That's strange, though."

"Why?"

"Well, it doesn't seem to me like a farm building should be small and made out 
of wood." I put my head between my hands. "Augh, this is all making my head 
ache."

"Then we'll stop. But you see?" He poked my temple with his index finger and 
smiled a warm, beautiful smile. "It's all in there. We just need to open it."

"Heh heh. I suppose we do." I leaned back onto my elbows, but even as I did 
so, I had the urge to move on. "Oy! You three! Come on, I want to get up to 
the top of the hill today."

"Sure," said Capo. "We have plenty of--"

"I'm telling you, so listen: can you eat nothing but seaweed without water to 
boil it in? No, of course not. And that proves my point." Ayarsca fended off a 
few last volleys from Mer‡n as we padded up along the path to the ridge on 
the island. Just over the crest we could look down into the bay on the eastern 
side of the island. It was a steep basin. The sides of the crescent all curved down 
until they met the shorline in a large inlet of the sea. On the far side of the inlet, 
standing as a sentinel to guard it, there was a tiny speck of an island that 
looked like little more than bare rock. The tips of the island curved around 
from it, waxing south of where we stood to a maximum of perhaps two 
thousand geofeet. At the base of the slope, approximately where the island 
was thickest, was a villiage smaller than Astro. There were 50 houses clustered 
around a pier, with some patches of grain inland and some boats on the water, 
nothing more.

Although the outward side of the island had been cultivated for growing 
grains, the inward side looked to be very wild still. I guessed that this was due 
to the steepness of the curve down to the waterline--there was simply no room 
to grow on any scale. True, along the path I could see where people had 
marked off plots and grown herb patches, but these were tiny exceptions to a 
much greater rule.

Our destination was just off the crest of the hill. There was a cluster of three 
very large buildings in the same whitewashed style I had seen all over the 
island. Capo took the lead and pointed them out. "That first one, that's where 
most of the teaching's done. We start school after we're named. Everyone 
who's been named since the start of the last term are all put in one grade 
together, and they all go through school in one group."

"And when do you stop?" I asked. "I guess that's kind of a silly question."

"No," she said. "You don't know what life is like. You can stop after you've 
gone through ten levels, or you get married."

"Eh? Why is that?"

Ayarsca laughed at me. "Who would have time to go to school when you're 
married? You've got a family to worry about!"

"Oh, of course. I wonder what I was thinking."

I caught Mer‡n's eye; she still looked sore from the argument on our way up. 
Capo had started talking again. "The last two grades are taught in that building 
over there. That's also where teachers can stay if they want to. I think only 
librarians are staying there right now."

"Librarians...that's right, you said you work at the library." I pointed to the 
third building. "That's it?"

"Yes. It's not open today because it's a quarter moon, but tomorrow you can 
come up and pay us a visit." Capo had cheered up as soon as we had arrived at 
the school grounds, and she was smiling with pride now. "It's the biggest 
library in all of Amanecer, I think one of the biggest in all of Marmundo. I 
don't think that there's anything you couldn't find out about in there."

"Wonderful," I said. "But it's closed...so...what shall we do now?" I turned to the 
others, looking for their help.

"Ah, you're the one who decides," said Arrasco.

"But I don't know what to decide on!" I replied. I laughed, and he did too. It 
was a joke he might have made.

"I know," said Capo. "We can walk south along the ridge, and when we get to 
the trail down by Auntie Galohena's house we can visit with her. Then there's 
the trail back down to town, and we'll be back by suppertime."

"Fine," I said neutrally. In truth, I was surprised that she had spoken up. 
Perhaps it was that Mer‡n was sulking and not competing with Ayarsca for air 
to breathe--Capo simply had a chance to express herself. We doubled back to 
the head of the main trail along the ridge and wandered south, each one of us 
lost in our own thoughts. It had been a long hike up and along the hill, but 
coming down would be much easier.

The sun had fallen from its apex over the course of our walk, and now was 
turning the sea at the western horizon to a browner streak of blue. From 
behind us, from the shaded east, a cool wind ran up off of the inlet. These were 
small cues, forboding the end of another day. Another day in a place now less 
mysterious to me, a place of things with names, not unidentifyable alien 
beings.

We had gone across the ridge until we were south of the town before we 
began our descent on another wide dirt pathway. This time, we had only 
stepped onto the path when we were confronted with a small house set on a 
natural dip in the otherwise convex slope. It was small by the standards of the 
island, no more than three rooms on a single story. Unlike other homes I had 
seen, this one had a chimney for a fireplace built into its near side. The house 
had all sorts of tall grasses growing around it, and bright flowers and herbs 
peeped out from between their blades. Two oratlanes were eating some dried 
grasses from a pile by the house. They whinnied as we approached from the 
path.

"Auntie Galohena? Are you there?" shouted Ayarsca when we were within 
earshot. She added in her speaking voice, "She doesn't hear well sometimes. I 
hope she heard."

Mer‡n finally found her voice. "Auntie Galohena? Auntie?"

"Yes, I'm here!" A muffled shout came from the inside of the house. A moment 
later, a real wooden door on squeaky hinges swung open and a woman in 
long ragged clothes stumbled outside. She looked as old as Grandmother, 
though certainly not as wisened: her skin was less wrinkly and she had a full 
head of hair. Her arms were also more meaty. She put her hand to her eyes to 
shield them from the sunlight that came in from her right and peered at us. 
"Oh! Mer‡n! Ayarsca! Capo! Come here, welcome to my little home. I was 
sitting on the floor and relaxing when I heard you girls...eh? Who's this with 
Arrasco?"

Although I was still a little ways away I gave a quick bow. "I'm a castaway. I 
came ashore on Grandmother's island a few days ago, and I don't remember 
who I am. Today we walked up to the library, I want to see if others like me 
have come to...Marmundo."

"Marmundo, yes. Come here." I expected her to have a close look at my face, 
but instead she embraced me tightly. "I am the ninth Auntie Galohena, and the 
pleasure of meeting you is mine. Come here! Have a seat."

A kind of low bench was built into the exterior of the house's western wall. 
Galohena led me to it and sat on it like it was a bench. I joined her, closed my 
eyes and faced into the sun. Arrasco sat on my other side and started idly 
working with his piedabo. Mer‡n and Ayarsca each started playing with an 
oratl‡n, while Capo wandered among the flowers and listened in on our 
conversation. She quickly tired of the activity and sat down with her cousin 
while we talked.

"Where are you staying?"

"With Ibanez...should I call her Se–ora Ibanez?"

"If she hasn't told you, I wouldn't worry. Tell me."

"Yes?"

"What kind of rent is she charging you?"

"Oh, I told her I'd help with cleaning the place, for room and board."

She was silent for a moment. By the time I could open my eyes and look at her, 
I felt that I had missed some other expression other than the interested 
camoflague she wore in its place.

"You arrived on the island today?"

"Yes, a few hours ago."

"'Horas'? What's an 'hora'?"

"A portion of a day. Two dozen make up a full day."

"Both morning and night?"

"Yes. I'm sure of it."

"But still, no memory, eh? Tell me what it's like."

"Well, I...I know that there must be something before I came onto 
Grandmother's island. I'm a young man, not a newborn, and I have this 
strange necklace and purse, so something must have come before. But if I 
didn't understand that these were clues, and if I had been all alone on the 
island, perhaps I never would have thought that I had any past at all."

"Let me ask you this, then. If instead of piercing her ear, we were to cut off a 
girl's earlobe when she was very small. Then she would never know what it 
was like to have an earlobe. She wouldn't wake up one morning and be sad 
because she was missing a piece of her ear. Is that the kind of loss you are 
talking about?"

I thought, and then I nodded slowly. "The problem is, my memory is more 
important than an earlobe..."

"Hee hee hee. Yes, it is."

"I use my memory. I feel where it should be. Those oratlanes you have, I 
thought at first that they would be called 'cabras', and I can half remember 
what a 'cabra' is. I remember that pliegalmejas are called 'brachiopods'. I can 
remember that metal is used as money in my world. I know what an hour is. 
But these memories are like threads that have unwound and then been tied 
into a knot, one gigantic knot, and I can only follow the strands so far."

"Is that so?"

"Yes." I turned my head to face her and opened my eyes. "Arrasco tried to help 
me earlier today, and he was very helpful. But my head was aching after only a 
little while, so we stopped."

"I think that that is a good thing," she said with a smirk. "Save your headaches 
for another time." We laughed. Then she went on, somberly. "My own mother 
was to be the Auntie Galohena, at one time. It was sad, because it was 
something she wanted to do very much, and I would have been proud of her. 
But her mind, too, unwound and then knotted all up. Very quickly. First she 
forgot things, then she remembered the wrong things, and then she was 
forgetting and remembering at the same time. It was only...five years, 
perhaps, from when we first suspected until she was dead.

"Another woman became Auntie Galohena. And she was a good woman, with 
a big heart. I never resented her presence. Still. She was not my mother. That is 
what was. It used to be that I was sad, always thinking about her. As time went 
on, I grew to fear for my own future--would I lose my memory, what would 
happen. Now I am resigned, and I try to enjoy warm afternoons and my 
family who come to visit. "

I had gone back to facing into the sun. "Tell me about your job," I said, "if you 
can."

"What about it?"

"What is 'Auntie Galohena'? Are you a governor? Or a priestess?"

"Boy...how will I explain this." She shifted her weight and said quietly, "It's no 
good, you know, asking what you know about this and that, because you 
yourself don't know what you don't know. I am not a governonr, nor a 
priestess, nor a doctor, though I do many of the things that they would do. In 
fact, I know how to do some of what each does...but that's not your question. I 
am Auntie Galohena. Anyone can come to me, but they must treat me as a 
member of their family. I can't favor one daughter or son more than another, 
but I can give them both advice, and I'm not afraid to tell someone that they're 
doing the wrong thing. Even if they are wealthy or powerful."

I let her answer sink into me in the tranquility of the afternoon. "I don't think," 
I said, "that I have ever heard of such a position. Does it keep you busy?"

"Yes, it does. But it's funny." Like Ayarsca had done before, she pinched my 
hair and pulled it. When I faced her, she confided, "It's on beautiful days like 
this that nobody comes to see me, but on rotten ones I have to do such-and-
such for almost everyone."

"What kind of a lesson is there to be learned from that?" I replied.

"Perhaps none," she admitted. She kept her eyes on me, watching me for what 
I would do next. It was an uncomfortable feeling, so I tried to put it out of my 
mind. I leaned back against the wall and looked down to the villiage, holding 
up my hand to block out the fiercest of the sun's rays as I looked at the white 
mass below.

"You look at the sun, too."

"What did you say, Auntie?"

"You look for yourself, you look at the world around you, and you look at the 
sun. But you can't quite see any of them. You don't remember your name, do 
you?"

"No. Everyone calls me boy, but I'll have to find a real name soon. Like Do–a 
Peque–a."

"Do–a Peque–a's name will tell us all about who she is, and yours should too," 
Auntie declared. "Remember that, boy. You pick your name, or someone picks 
it for you, but both are hard to change, like yourself."

"I suppose," I sighed. Really, it was hard to give the old woman any response if 
she would speak like that.

"Hey, everyone!" Mer‡n shouted. "I'm tired and I'm hungry. Can we go home 
and have dinner yet?"

"Me too," said Ayarsca.

The girls' behavior struck me as imputdent and disrespectful, but nobody was 
paying it any mind. "All right," said Arrasco. "Let's go on home, then." We said 
a few goodbyes to AuntieGalohena, and I promised her that I would come for 
a visit someday soon. We sauntered down the winding trail to the villiage, 
spread out in an oval with Arrasco and myself at the downhill end, Capo with 
Mer‡n a distance behind us, and Ayarsca wandering here and there.

"I wanted to ask you something," I murmurred to Arrasco. "Auntie 
Galohena...she asked me about the rent. You remember?"

"Yes, I do?"

"What did she mean by that?"

Arrasco shrugged. "Just old ladies' talk."

Instead of asking what he meant right away, I thought about the phrase. "Say, 
that's right, Auntie Galohena sounded like Grandmother when she said that, 
and some other things, too. Is that what all old women end up sounding like?"

"Yes," he chuckled. "They play games with each other and with us, where they 
will try to have as many meanings as they can in just a few words."

That joke I found funny. We were entering the villiage and dusk was falling. I 
said loudly enough for everyone to hear, "Today has been a busy day." They 
agreed.